Flexibility and chaos

3 times changing apartments, 9 different flatmates, 6 different types of jobs from cleaning yachts to english teacher, 58 plans (which always change), thousands of people you know then lose as fast as you knew them. Sometimes I think it is me, who is chaotic and deep inside I love to be in a mess because otherwise would be bored, but I reached the point to dream about some kind of order. This makes me think that this city really helps  to create chaos around yourself. Barcelona does not seem to be a huge metropolis, but it is always changing. People who come here then go in some months, jobs where they take you then fire because they know there are 10 people for your place to start immediately, places, bars, possibilities, friendships ... everything is going fast and if you are a bit open the vawes catch you finding yourself in the middle of a mess. I really love Barcelona and the life here but starting to dream about some kind of order. I tend to be lost but to tell the truth Im happy to be lost here. Why? Because it is a creative loss, searching goals, plans, and dreaming. At home I was paralized and here I feel that it is me who is organizing the life, I am alone but not lonely, a lot of persons and their ideas support me without telling me what should I do, simply observing their life help me. So now I am learning to make decisions, be flexible and to ... take it easy! ;)